Group X, Altarpieces, Nos. 1
Esther Rose - Wanton Way of Loving
Boulevard Montmartre - Night by Camille Pissarro / La Vie en Rose - Louis Armstrong
Tracey Chapman - Fast Car
Elvis - If I Can Dream
Huangguoshu Waterfall
Pang Xunqin - 1940
Owl on a Pine Branch (1833)
Utagawa Hiroshige
Boston Cremes (1962) - Wayne Thiebaud
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Honestly asking, how is it misogyny? For me I tolerate being called dude very easily, but it’s not like that for all genderfluid people I suppose. I guess it would bother me if someone was saying I look like a dude on a day where I only identitified as “she/her” and was dressed very femininely. But calling me dude without saying or implying that I look like one is very different. That’s fine to me.
I had both of my genders repressed, so I may be extra hungry to collect overt acknowledgement of both of my genders. I’ll have to see in the future what does and doesn’t bother me. You may be saying something useful to my own journey. Not saying this is you, for me idk if me deciding to avoid being called “dude” would be me overthinking and being too in my head.
Why is this? It seems like it would be because you’re being called compared to a masculine noun on a day where it defies your identity. Is there really much difference between one being told they look like a dude vs being called a dude.
If it would bother you to be called a dude, then your understanding of that word doesn’t seem to be that gender neutral
I think someone saying it to say “hey, you…” to me, or “omg” or “woah” is different than when they mean “you look masculine.” Those are some of the different ways I hear the word dude. Usage matters.
I think I don’t understand genderfluidity for others in this way. I know some people that do not go by she/he pronouns exist, but I only understand having she/he/they all at once. If there are resources or experiences you guys can share about being genderfluid and not going by either she or he that’d probably help me understand a better picture of how other people’s genderfluidities can work.
Why not just say “hey, you,” “omg,” or “woah”? These are all perfectly gender neutral phrases. What we’re objecting to is using a very gendered word in place of gender neutral phrases and pretending like the word suddenly becomes gender neutral. Dude is a gendered word, and using it in place of gender neutral phrases, especially to someone who is not a dude, is exactly what is meant by “man by default” language
Is “man by default” language always misogynist? Is it because it erases the possibility that something could be gender neutral or feminine? Therefore erasing gender identity that isn’t masculine?
yes, exactly this
To be clear, it’s not bad to like being called dude, or to be okay with people using it for you. Your preferences are your preferences. What is bad is you yourself using it in a gender neutral way to refer to people who are not dudes.
I, for example, am not gender fluid. I spend 100% of my time identifying as a woman. There is no situation in which I would not object to being called dude, and an insistence that it’s actually okay to call me dude (a masculine gendered word) because it’s supposedly gender neutral, is incredibly frustrating.
you are a deeply unserious person.
No, I’m seriously trying to understand for those who’ll bear with me.
Words intended to and frequently being used specifically for males are often generalized to be “inclusive” of women by simply making the male-term a “gender-neutral” option. Dude, guy, bro, fireman, etc. Its pretty much never the opposite direction and it would be considered insulting to call man a “firewoman”, but not the other way around. The tendency for this clearly is based on misogyny.
Do you think being “color-blind” means you aren’t racist?