it’s hot. also i’m growing cacti from seed which is new to me and i’m excited, a few of them are sprouting now. how are you?
Join our public Matrix server!
https://matrix.to//#/#tracha-space:transfem.dev
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It’s for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
spoiler
One thing that seems to be true of trans femmes around our age that came out after adulthood, is were all very good at denying the things we want and depersonalizing. You’ve probably had a life time of self denial where those neural patterns are very worn in. You will have to learn to want the things you want and let yourself feel it.
If you want others to use she/her pronouns - tell them! Keep presenting femme, wear a skirt, a dress, wear makeup, grow your hair. Take HRT! Voice train (please by all that is holy, start ASAP. You might feel embarrassed or have a hard time starting, do it and start training - I swear passing is like 80% voice training)
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Omg the first sentence is very true lol. Like I was wearing femme clothes in private, and only bought things that I could most easily hide under mens clothing, or were super cheap and not something I had (like I had one dress so I wouldn’t buy another). Now that my partner knows, its so hard to look at clothes and think whether or not I like it, since I got so used to just having whatever. And when dressing masc my whole life, I never really liked anything. Come to find out, apparently I looked weird in mens clothing lol.
I’ve tried make-up a few times, and would take pictures. Its when I started tearing up and thought “wait, am I hot?” that I realized I had to do something instead of hiding. And luckily I have great hair :) I have even been cat called which was a weirdly mixed experience. I wasn’t even really presenting femme, just bent over in my garden…
Thank you