You must log in or register to comment.
If you pay 12 bucks for 4 strips of bacon, you deserve to be scammed by the world’s one of the cringiest man to exist.
It’s actually 12 bucks for 12 strips of bacon but the other 8 are coming in an update (currently estimated for Q2 2026).
it’s worth it if it’s fried in beef tallow
Isn’t all bacon fried in its own pork tallow?
yeah but beef tallow is the most unwoke and redpilled kind, so they have to use it
Imagine never growing as a person. Just totally stuck in silly cultural shit from almost 20 years ago.
Me when le narwhal bacons at midnight…FFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
updooting this epic post
Thanks for the epic gold kind stranger! This rulz!
Le epic gem! To the top with you!
And my axe!
Isn’t this American culture basically. Just referencing pop culture and shit
Yeah, but some people (more and more tbh) are stuck on nostalgia mode.
Slammer aproved post
it’s a simple one but sometimes that’s all you need
COME OUT, WE GOT YOU SURROUNDED, WAIT 11 HOURS AT THE BAZINGA DINER!
I HATE THE WEST I HATE THE WEST I HATE THE WEST I HATE THE WEST
get out of here with your facts and logic, it’s almost as if elon is freakin epic amazeballs! 😂🤣
your comment has personally insulted me and we must now engage in fisticuffs
it’s an honor to duel a distinguished gentlethem and scholar such as yourself tips hat 🕵️
The cybertruck bacons at midnight (baconing is slang for spontaneously combusting).
It’s amazing anyone would hold onto this form of early internet speak. By 2014 it was already considered cringe. On a post in /r/outoftheloop someone explains the “narwhal bacons at midnight” thing and someone replies "This is like looking back at our childhood and cringing at the stupid stuff we did. " And. that was ELEVEN years ago!
https://www.reddit.com/r/OutOfTheLoop/comments/296nrm/deleted_by_user/
What’s even more embarrassing is that Elon wasn’t a teenager back then, he was like 40.
A Reddit link was detected in your comment. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.
2011 wants its memes back.
tesla diner…
taking your grok-powered AI GF to the tesla diner where you can share a ketamalt milkshake and some epic bacon dipped in awesomesauce
The website uses the phrase “retro-futuristic” multiple times. Ugh.
Racist flying cars
The only vegan option on the menu is the salad, if we assume they serve the only listed dressing on the side.
The club sandwich appears to have two strips of bacon and you get a whole club sandwich on top of that for $15. So Tesla diner logic is that a club sandwich costs the same as the $9 grilled cheese (using the same bread so that’s removed as cost differential) if you subtract the cost of the bacon.
These things are all absurd, but the funniest part is they offer wagyu chili. They took a type of beef that is considered premium for its unaltered flavor and texture….and made chili. They seasoned the out of the flavor and cooked out the texture.
The general pricing thing with the bacon is an extreme version of what all restaurants do to a point, but they went too far and made it obvious. Drinks are always a huge huge margin, especially if its not booze, fries and bread are like maybe a bit over a quarter in food cost per portion. You use the high value stuff to bring em in so they buy the low value stuff for a lot while you got em. But you gotta balance it right so you don’t give the game away so blatantly.
Im trying to go meat eater brain regarding that chilli, if I recall waygu beef has a really high fat content. That is gonna split so hard in tomato sauce that it may even float to the top and harden overnight in the fridge. There is a reason even top tier places don’t grind up prime cuts to make s burger, its fucking pointless or detrimental to the final product.
I get that markups exist and the whole menu is an ecosystem of interacting costs (gotta make the money to pay the people who add value via labor), but this menu is priced in a batshit manner.
And your meat-brain attempt is spot on, everything I searched to make sure I wasn’t showing my ass indicated chili is best at an 80/20 ratio. Wagyu starts above that and is typically closer to 30.
Thars what i was saying. Theyre giving the game away and making it too obvious.
And bwef wise, if theyre holding it at serving temp its gonna be like 3 inches of fat with chilli underneath
Thanks for the follow-up, I got too deep in trying to figure out how a quarter of the carb cost made sense to see the point that it’s not meant to make sense it’s to obfuscate the various mark-ups so the customer is cool with it… I think, if I’m getting it now at least.
Maybe they realize they don’t need to? A cyber-uck that realizes the inflated price probably has the money and chalks it off to “the mega-screen amenity surcharge”, the “charging station premium”, and/or the “retro-futurist diner experience”.
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
Reminds me of Jordan Peterson’s recipe for A5 Kobe beef:
Take fresh steak, throw it in the freezer, pull it out, put into an air fryer at and bake at 450°F/230°C until medium in the inside, drain the rendered fat, make an “”“au jus”“” with water and salt.
For a man who subsists almost entirely on beef, he’s horrendously bad at cooking it.
(Sorry for the Reddit tier shit but it’s real) I initially misread that as Jordan Peele because I’m hammered, and was like “A-tier bit, how did I miss that episode”. On second glance, Benz is are the devil and JP is the Antichrist. Not only for this, but damn it’s a strong argument.
These things are all absurd, but the funniest part is they offer wagyu chili. They took a type of beef that is considered premium for its unaltered flavor and texture….and made chili. They seasoned the out of the flavor and cooked out the texture.
hell yeah that is epic. everyone know wagyu is the best beef. i don’t eat meat and I still know that. so, of course it would make the best chili. i hope they have an otoro tuna melt as well
What’s the vegan equivalent in your opinion? Deep frying a small batch nut cheese? Boiling a premium king oyster mushroom? Making a seasoned to hell tomato sauce with high-grade heirlooms?
The thing about vegan cooking is it tends to be low waste, so I’m drawing a blank on anything 1:1 in terms of total ingredient abuse.
Buying 30 year old Macallan to mix with generic brand cola in a red solo cup.
The same part of my brain that idly notes that I could jump into a busy street if I wanted to is wondering what that would taste like.
About the same as a jack and coke at that point
Throw tomatoes at anyone who does this wtf. You win.
I remember going to the party of a friend of a friend who came from money. He was in his early 20s. He busted out a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue and poured everyone shots. Then he cracked open a Red Bull and poured out little chasers for everyone. I was planning to sip mine since thats like a $150-200 bottle, so I was pretty whatever about it. Then before I could even process what was happening, he poured the shots into the Red Bulls and handed them to us. I looked at the drink in my hand with great dismay.
Johnny Walker Blue in and of itself is a tell. There are many better whiskys and whiskeys at that price point, but JW has the better name recognition.
As someone who was raised vegan my answer is just the sad way the majority of vegans make tofu
Seriously just watch a few Chinese cooking videos at least, Chinese people have been cooking with tofu as an ingredient for like 1000 years and they know what they’re doing
Stop following the failed recipes of white hippies from the 70’s because the entire foundation of information that westerners are using to cook tofu is wrong
Tofu wants to be cubed, tofu wants to be fried, tofu wants to be used in soups, tofu does not want to be scrambled or blended into a sauce
pressing it between stacks of books (just buy pressed tofu if that’s what you want)
coating it in cornstarch and spices
in europe you can even buy tofu marinated with basil and tomato (???)
i love all kinds of tofu though, even the occasional scramble and cream cheese, but i think to get your tofu drivers license you should have regular tofu dishes (卤豆腐, 家常豆腐, 铁板豆腐, even the in the west so often misunderstood 麻婆豆腐) before you start doing some western shenanigans
tofu does not want to be scrambled
the first tofu I liked was used as a replacement for scrambled eggs. No idea how they did it, but shit was good.
Im gonna scramble tofu and put it in breakfast burritos and im gonna love it.
Is it the best way to enjoy tofu? No. Is it the best way to make a breakfast burrito? Yes.
using a premium miso and some virgin coconut oil to make a cultured butter, and then using that butter to fry a supermarker sliced bread sandwich
getting the first fresh tender spring bamboo shoots and cutting them up for hot and sour soup
taking a high-grade craft soy sauce and mixing it up with sweaty onion powder, smoked paprika and le epic nutritional yeast to make a marinade for tvp steaks
idk i enjoy making weird stuff when cooking but i can see epic vegan youtube cooks doing all of these
Using Kashmiri saffron as kindling to roast a marshmallow
Thanks for my next meal prep ideas /jk
Those were horrific. Esp. The bamboo shoots since I can’t fresh here.
I love doing trash food with fancy ingredients, and while also vegan i feed meat guys as a job and need to imagine what they like. Waygu would be really bad for chilli cause its too fatty, it would split the sauce. One of the only meat foods I still get a weird craving for is my mom’s mid as hell tuna melt, I’ve tried to replicate with a lot of things but its just never quite there. All she did was mix canned tuna, mayonnaise, relish and diced onions and spread it on a bisquivk based dough. I’ll figure out a recipe that hits that spot one day but its my trash food white whale.
lots of people use mashed chickpeas instead of canned tuna but imo the texture and flavor are both off. you could use finely chopped green jackfruit maybe but shit’s expensive in the west i’m sure
Ive tried both. I think a combo and some tofu can make it all come together. I’ll get it and ill lost about it when I do. Jackfruit is actually cheap af but you gotta go to an Asian market for it, which is fine and dandy, they have the cheapest domestic veggies too
I’m surprised they didn’t spell it “waygu”
Also the fuck is this? What do they think nitro cold brew is?
cold brew over ice is good tho
Right, but that is not nitro cold brew in the picture and you do not serve nitro over ice.
“Nitro means fast” — the great minds at Tesla
god i hate talking to coffee people
edit: stop replying to this comment i don’t give a shit
Then don’t reply to a comment being pedantic about the definition of a coffee drink. I don’t know what else you expected.
Mfw words have meanings
I married a coffee person because I love autism
Well it was really to share my insurance, but the coffee and weed autism is really endearing and I love her for a lot of other reasons too 😍
Removed by mod
please disengage i don’t want anymore notifications :)
It’s probably not even cold brew
Tbh, it looks mildly carbonated, I don’t think it’s even coffee. It’s probably some AI shit.
Probably an AI photo
That looks like coca cola when the machine is running low on syrup
The only thing I can think about is that you could get a large package of bacon for that price.
Also, Tesla diner?
$4.99 a pound at my store so you can get more than one.
a building crying out for a molotov
Now that I’m looking at the whole thing I actually kinda like it. The “epic bacon” and a few other menu items stand out as not really fitting the diner theme, and the big movie screen feels like it was thrown in there because drive in theaters are a retro thing and not because it actually fits the concept. Overall 6/10 needs work.
Doge. Epic bacon. Kek. Let that sink in.
This man is trying to drag you back to a time where he was popular. By force.
The thought of eating that shit is vile and it also costing 12 dollars is fucking insane lmao
US$12 for four strips of bacon is criminal
Hello. Can I have a large Bacon King meal, hold the cheese, hold the patties, hold the buns, no condiments?
That’s two whole things of bacon, or one and half things of nice-ass bacon where I live. Maybe 15+ strips of nice-ass bacon and all I have to do is put it in the oven for like 18 minutes and not support a nazi.
